ARQUIUSPRITE: Oh, nothing much
ARQUIUSPRITE: Just enjoying the good life
ARQUIUSPRITE: One which quite lu%uriously involves both having a corporeal body, and not being dead
ARQUIUSPRITE: I have been delighting myself with some truly kickbottom internal monodialogues
ARQUIUSPRITE: Did you know that, even though technically I knew this already, I find myself astounded to meditate upon the fact that human beings are capable of lactation?
ARQUIUSPRITE: Isn't that incredible, Dirk?
ARQUIUSPRITE: I mean, when one really thinks about it
ARQUIUSPRITE: To have such convenient access to fresh milk
ARQUIUSPRITE: The mare thought of it, I must say puts a little giddyup in my phantom legs
ARQUIUSPRITE: And yet
ARQUIUSPRITE: I must admit the notion of lactic discharge jetting from one's swollen pectoral masses...
ARQUIUSPRITE: It strikes me as positively indecorous
ARQUIUSPRITE: My horseguy robosweat is running cold just pondering the depravity of it
DIRK: Uuuugh.
ARQUIUSPRITE: Yet fascinatingly, this ability only manifests itself in human females
ARQUIUSPRITE: As opposed to how one would reasonably e%pect dairy to originate, which is from the corpulent udder of a sublimely chiseled male musclebeast
ARQUIUSPRITE: Or failing that, certain species found within the butler genus
ARQUIUSPRITE: As a former simulation of a human who has recently been given reason to have hella opinions on milk production, I think the way females have cornered this boon is the height of biological injustice
ARQUIUSPRITE: Have you ever dwelt upon this cruelty, dude esquire?
DIRK:
ARQUIUSPRITE: Your silence speaks volumes to your interest, so I'll keep talking about this a lot
ARQUIUSPRITE: I will have to confess that my Alternian half boggles at the anatomical incongruities between our races with respect to dairy secretion
ARQUIUSPRITE: Really, he had no idea that's what those were for
ARQUIUSPRITE: Female trolls of course have them as well, but they are certainly not meant for supplying the young with nourishment
ARQUIUSPRITE: Actually, and this trivia will surely wet your whistle for additional such facts, those voluptuous anatomical features have a number of significant purposes, biologically speaking
ARQUIUSPRITE: I shall now e%plicate for you these purposes in assiduous detail
DIRK: I don't want to hear any of this!